What I Have Learned From Erikson

According to Erik Erikson (1966), when we reach the age range between 40 to 65, we will struggle to generate ourselves to be as productive as possible, in a caring way. If we fail to do so, we will become stagnant. Spending our whole day just basically doing nothing. He called this stage ‘generativity vs. stagnant’. The two main avenues for our generativity at this stage will be caregiving and employment.

Erik Erikson

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Although caregiving might involve meeting another person’s physical needs (feeding, cleaning, transportation, etc.), actually caregiving revolves a lot about fulfilling one’s psychological needs (feeling loved, appreciated, valued, etc.). And this happens regardless of what kind of connection that we have with our caregivers, be it our foster parents, stepparents or others.

Have you ever heard of sandwich generation? It is a term used to refer to the generation of middle-aged people who are supposedly squeezed by the needs of the younger and older members of their families.

By our logic, we might think that this generation may feel pressured by these obligations. I mean juggling between 2 priorities is hard. No doubt that this statement does contain some truth. But contrary to our logic, most adults of this generation, although feeling pressured, are actually not burdened by them, either because they enjoy fulfilling them or because they choose to take on only some of them or none of them.

As for employment, although younger generations may perceive ‘going to work’ as something that is not fun or boring,  adults have many psychosocial needs that employment can, and will, actually fulfill through working. Apart from being able to support the education and health of their families, employment also enables adults to express their creative energy, develop their personal skills, and ultimately contribute to the community by providing goods or services.

So, although the extrinsic rewards may make jobs appeal, it is actually the intrinsic rewards of work itself that make someone to continue working, completely contrary to our beliefs that how much do we make from a job is the key factor of our satisfaction of our jobs.

Why am I telling you all of these?

Well, these are some of the things that I have learned in my course, and I am revising them to prepare for my finals in the upcoming week. Feel free to Google and search more about Erikson and his psychosocial stages, if you are interested.

And, wish me luck too. I need it.

But, apart from that, revising these also make me realize something.

As a nineteen-years-old girl, I am having thoughts that when I am forty, I will be successful by retiring early and have lots of wealth. And I can rest for as long as I want and I can do whatever I want, far from receiving orders from anyone. I thought that being free and resting long will make me happy when I turn forty.

So I am quite shocked to learn that once you’re forty, your happiness will actually decrease if you are not given the opportunity to do something. Even if you have reached forty years old, you will inevitably continue to seek things to do, whether by taking care of your family members, or still going to work until you are physically unable to do so.

Or even both. Who knows?

So, to young people out there, if you are picking a job, pick a job that you love, after considering those extrinsic rewards that may appeal to you. Because, although those rewards are crucial, your happiness ultimately depends on you enjoying what you do.

So pick what you love. Or at least, pick what you don’t hate. Because what’s the point of living your life doing something that you hate?

This is just a quick share of what I have learned and my insights of it.

What is the most useful thing you can do after you learn something, other than reflecting on it, right?

This is what actually motivates me to keep learning. Although I might not know my job after my graduated, if I use whatever knowledge that I have now, to reflect and apply it to improve myself, I am doing a great work already.

       

Finally, whoever you are and whatever condition that you are in,
I pray that you will be able, and continue,
to love what you do and to do what you love.

So, that is what I learned from Erikson.

Thank you, Erikson.