“When you get better, when you fall, it definitely hurts more.”

A few days ago, I went roller-skating with a friend of mine.
For your information, especially if you have never been doing this but wanting so badly to do it, roller-skating is not a thing that you can just do. There’s basics that you need to learn. To me specifically, it’s like learning how to walk again differently. And it makes sense, considering that you are moving with completely different ‘feet’, with different physics rules being applied to it. So, do try to Google first how to roller-skate, and don’t expect yourself to be sliding in just seconds.

Anyway, back to the story…

I have my basics down, but not my friend. So I taught her step by step, and she caught on as time flew. One obvious thing, she fell down a lot. Again, makes sense. You are basically learning to walk again. Babies fall down a bunch of time before they can master walking.
But as I mentioned, she caught on the basics, and after a few hours, she could decently skate. But as she got better, she hesitated more to go further, because she feared that she would fall like the previous hours.

I spontaneously said, “Yeah, when you get better, when you fall, it definitely hurts more.”
My friend: “You could say that again!”
But then, I convinced her to keep going, because how else is she going to learn more?

And in that moment, I had a realization.

“When you get better, when you fall, it definitely hurts more.”

Isn’t that life all about?

As you grow older, you learn & master more about many things. But those also come with bigger failures & challenges. And along with that, comes bigger pain.

As babies, you’ll cry when you fall down.
As toddlers, you’ll throw tantrums when your mom is not giving you that favourite candy.
As school students, you’ll be sad because your grades are not that satisfying.
As teenagers, you’ll be frustrated because you’re not getting along with your friends
As young adults, you’ll fear of being abandoned by your romantic partner.
As adults, you’ll be worried for not being able to manage your finances wisely.
As adults in their 40s, you’ll be extra conscious about your children’s progress.
As elders, you’ll fear dying itself.

All of these things just keep piling up, one after another. I bet this is not the first time you feel like you want to give up. All of those problems, unfulfilled expectations, failures, worries, all of those just make you just want to quit life.
But again, if the philosophy of whatever happened during me roller-skating with my friends is true, then despite the many ways we can cope & solve problems, in reality we can help ourselves only if we keep going.

Why?

1. How else will you learn?

Yes, it hurts to fall. Yes, it hurts to fall over & over.
But if my friend did not continue to roller-skate, she will either stuck in the middle of the rink, or she will just keep falling over & over, without actually learning how to prevent less falls.

The same goes with life. As you mature, you’ll learn more about how to deal with things in life. And before you know it, those particular things will not even a big deal to you anymore. But then, you’ll face bigger challenges in life. And the way to overcome those challenges is just to do the exact same thing that you’ve always been doing; keep going & learn.

For example, if you’re around my age, you will no longer cry because you fall down in the streets. Maybe just a bit of ‘ouch, that hurts, and embarrassing!’, but then you’ll continue walking.
You won’t act out in the middle of people because your favourite candy runs out.
You won’t dwell on your bad school days, because those days are not affecting your current days.
But now, you’ll doubt if someone will ever love you & want to be with you for lifetime. You’ll worry that your spending habits will make you go bankrupt. You’ll worry on how you are going to educate your future children in this challenging era.

You’ll worry, and it’s actually a good thing that you’re worrying. But to overcome those worries, you need to live the current days, and learn from it. Before you know it, time will flies & you will overcome those challenges.

2. Great people have bigger problems – Dean Graziosi

You’ll deal with stress with everything that you do. Stress levels are actually the same if you play small or big.

Think about it. That baby is probably feeling very distressed because she falls. That toddler is probably feeling very distressed because she could not have the candy. When you was a teenager, you probably feel very distressed when you could not fit in with your friends.

But, guess what? The stress level is the same.

So, if great people have bigger problems, we can rephrase it this way; if you’re feeling that your problems are getting bigger & bigger, that means you are getting greater & greater as a person.

A hardship in a new level of life, is an indicator of you being in the new level!

How cool is that, if we think about it that way?

3. Your pain is a sign of you being alive

If you’re wishing a life with no difficulties, no hardships, no obstacles & no pain, then you’re basically wishing a life of a dead person.

In other words, every difficulty, every hardship, every obstacle, and every pain that you’ve felt, as a sign of you being alive.

I think that’s enough of this post. I’ll conclude it here.

If you are going through hardship, and you just feel that hardship is getting bigger & bigger, and almost impossible to overcome,
just remember that you feeling the pain, and you being in a hard condition, is a sign that you are alive, you are learning & you are growing.

If you are now alive, learning & growing from this pain & this hardship, you will overcome it.

Hang in there, you will get through it.